It's a terrible feeling, having nothing to say. Work is sucking the life out of me again, and even though things are going okay, I fear I've become terribly boring.
Our department is hosting campus visits this week and next. I'm one of the first to meet the candidates; am picking both up from hotels and taking to dinner the night before their job talks and full day of interviews. I'm curious about them, especially the woman. But I'm done caring about how many publications they have or what they can teach. I wonder about their senses of humor, the way they talk, what their non-academic interests are. I find myself longing to meet (for us to hire) someone I might hang out with. I even worry, "will they like me?" How pathetic is that? Were I in a bigger town I might sign up for yoga classes or dance lessons or aerobics or a book club or a knitting circle or anything that might involve meeting new people. But in this small factory town, you'd be hard pressed to find any of those things....
So I go to work, I come home, I talk to P. and play with the cats and go to bed and wake up and do it all over again. And in between I read all sorts of far more interesting blogs & look at very cute pictures of other people's kids and feel encouraged and lonely at the same time.
What's wrong with me?
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